Here's hoping you had a marvelous Thanksgiving. Which makes me wonder what the Indianapolis Colts were thankful for -- that a comet didn't destroy their city? Other than that, it's been a really rotten year for them.

    Coach Jim Caldwell was asked about the value of their bye week: "We get a chance to really sit down, take a look at everybody across the board, make certain that we have everyone in the proper position, and see where we want to go from this point forward."

    The amazing thing is that they did all that -- and still reported back to work.

    And speaking of coming back for more despite total ineptitude...

 

    Last Thursday: OK, I was just one out of three, so shoot me. Lions were a total failure but give credit to the Dolphins for almost beating the Cowboys. That was a great game as long as you ignored your preconceptions about both teams. Whatever their final record, the Fish have earned my respect. Does that mean I will stop making cheap jokes about them? Don't be silly. It's who I am, it's what I do.

 

    Minnesota (2-8) at Atlanta (6-4) -- Falcons favored by 9.5 -- Do not expect any pillaging or plundering from this band of Vikings. Defense has given up 72 points in last 2 losses plus a total of 19 passing TDs this season. And do you really think QB Christian Ponder is going to save the day?

    Jerry says: Falcons by 17.

 

    Cleveland (4-6) at Cincinnati (6-4) -- Bengals favored by 7 -- In last 5 games Bengals have scored 126 while Browns have totaled 54. 'Nuff said 'cause we don't really care anyway. When it comes to Ohio teams, think of us as LeBron James.

    Jerry says: Bengals but just by 5.

 

    Carolina (2-8) at Indianapolis (0-10) -- Panthers favored by 3.5 -- GanGreene Game of the Week, maybe the Season -- Even though Panthers have lost last 3, they still scored 103 while Dolts totaled 20 in their last 3. Chris Myers and Tim Ryan must wonder why Fox is doing this to them. Incidentally, last week the Panthers actually took Can Newton out of the backfield to run a little Wildcat. If they do that against the Dolt D, it should be a firing offense.

    Jerry says: Panthers by 7.

 

    Houston (7-3) at Jacksonville (3-7) -- Texans favored by 6.5 -- We all get to see QB Matt Leinart climb out of the hot tub and actually play some football. As an early Christmas gift, he gets WR Andre Johnson back along with RBs Arien Foster and Ben Tate. He should be just fine.

    Jerry says: Texans by 11.

 

    Buffalo (5-5) at East Rutherford Jets (5-5) -- Jets favored by 9.5 -- The Mediocrity Bowl. In last 3 losses, Bills outscored 126-26. That's not good. Also will start their third different center in last 3 weeks. That's not good. Also went 0-12 on third downs last week. That's not good. -- Can you smell what I'm cooking here?

    Jerry says: Jets by 11.

 

    Arizona (3-7) at St. Louis (2-8) -- Lambs favored by 2.5 -- These clubs really hacked that GanGreene Game of the Week already taken as they think they are a lock. But we do have great news for Cards QB John Skelton: His passer rating last week was in double digits. Hey, 10.5 is double digits. -- Not that the Lambs are any good either.

    Jerry says: In a I-Really-Have-No-Idea-Why Upset Special, Cards by 3.

 

    Tampa Bay (4-6) at Tennessee (5-5) -- Titans favored by 3.5 -- Yucs Coach Raheem Morris called for an onsides kick against Green Bay that failed. He said afterwards: "We're not going to apologize for being aggressive." How about apologizing for being stupid?

    Jerry says: Titans by 7.

 

    Chicago (7-3) at Oakland (6-4) -- Raiders favored by 4 -- If you have a clue, help a brother out. We all know the Bears lost their QB but the Raiders offense is really banged up, too.

    Jerry says: In a 'Cause-I-Feel-Their-Pain Upset Special, Da Bears by 1.

 

    Washington (3-7) at Seattle (4-6) -- SeaTurkeys by 3.5 -- Isn't this a week when at least one thing should go right for turkeys, even SeaTurkeys?

    Jerry says: Turkeys by 6.

 

    New England (7-3) at Philadelphia (4-6) -- Patsies favored by 3.5 -- We keep saying there should be a Congressional investigation of the Patsy schedule. After this, it's Indy, Washington, Denver, Miami and Buffalo. Please.

    Jerry says: Coasting Patsies by 8.

 

    Denver (5-5) at San Diego (4-6) -- DisChargers favored by 6 -- The Tebownites must be driving Vegas crazy. When does it stop?

    Jerry says: DisChargers but just by 3 as Tim Tebow almost does it again.

 

    Pittsburgh (7-3) at Kansas City (4-6) -- Sunday night -- Steelers favored by 10.5 -- Imagine the point spread if the Steelers were home? Let's see, QB Ben Roethlisberger has a broken thumb and Chiefs gave up 244 yards rushing in last home game. What does this mean? Fantasy owners should start all their Rashard Mendenhalls.

    Jerry says: Steelers by 15.

 

    East Rutherford Giants (6-4) at New Orleans (7-3) -- Monday night -- Saints favored by 7 -- Giants lost last 2 and are fading; Saints won last 2 and are gearing up. Plus in last 2 meetings, Saints have outscored Giants 78-34. And Saints 53.3 third-down conversion rate is amazing. Need more? No, you don't.

    Jerry says: Saints by 17.

 

    That's it. Enjoy the rest of your holiday weekend unless, of course, you are a turkey.